My latest encounter with customer logic:
Me: Your knife tip is broken, do you want to repair that? There's an additional cost to grind down that section.
Customer: No no, there's no need. I don't use the knife tip.
Me: *thinks about knife constantly getting caught on cutting board* Okay
Me: Your cleaver has a lot of rust on it, do you want to remove it?... Or do you have any polish at home to remove it on your own?
Customer: Hmm... mmm... The rust is fine, no need for removal.
Me: *thinks about all the bacteria and food getting stuck in the blade, and rust flaking off onto food* Okay
Customer: I tried sharpening the cleaver on my own, but it couldn't pass the paper cut test.
Me: Yeah... It's a meat cleaver. It's got a very wide edge angle and made of softer steel because it's designed for breaking and splitting food apart, like a tiny axe. It won't really pass your "paper cut test" because the angle is really wide... What have you been using it for?
Customer: It was given to me brand new, unused. I haven't used it yet.
Me: *thinks about repairing yet another botched sharpening* Okay
Customer: After your sharpening, my knife looks very different, seems smaller!
Me: Yeah, knife sharpening works by carefully removing metal to create a sharp edge. All knives get smaller during sharpening, never bigger.
Customer: Ah yes, it makes sense.
Me: Your knife tip is broken, do you want to repair that? There's an additional cost to grind down that section.
Customer: No no, there's no need. I don't use the knife tip.
Me: *thinks about knife constantly getting caught on cutting board* Okay
Me: Your cleaver has a lot of rust on it, do you want to remove it?... Or do you have any polish at home to remove it on your own?
Customer: Hmm... mmm... The rust is fine, no need for removal.
Me: *thinks about all the bacteria and food getting stuck in the blade, and rust flaking off onto food* Okay
Customer: I tried sharpening the cleaver on my own, but it couldn't pass the paper cut test.
Me: Yeah... It's a meat cleaver. It's got a very wide edge angle and made of softer steel because it's designed for breaking and splitting food apart, like a tiny axe. It won't really pass your "paper cut test" because the angle is really wide... What have you been using it for?
Customer: It was given to me brand new, unused. I haven't used it yet.
Me: *thinks about repairing yet another botched sharpening* Okay
Customer: After your sharpening, my knife looks very different, seems smaller!
Me: Yeah, knife sharpening works by carefully removing metal to create a sharp edge. All knives get smaller during sharpening, never bigger.
Customer: Ah yes, it makes sense.